Some Concluding Thoughts

It is Monday at 5:30 am. We are on a 2 hour delay. I arrived in Pittsburgh at 6:30 pm Friday and I was beyond excited to see my family. We drove straight home and I have not left the house since.  I have been sleeping for the better part of the weekend.  Jet lag.  When you fly across that many time zones, the jet lag is fierce.  I continually feel like I am recovering from anesthesia. Disoriented, dehydrated, no appetite.  But the thing that has been the hardest is the feelings I have deep within my being.  I miss the friends that I made and all of the children I came to love.  Their faces and voices and songs are going round and round in my head and I want so much to be able to see them and talk to them.  And at the same time, the horrors of what I saw haunt me relentlessly.  The cowardly thing to do would be to put into gear those defense mechanisms I have learned all too well and pretend that either it wasn't as horrible as it appeared, or that if I just absorb myself back into my comfortable culture, I will feel better.  But the truth is, that it was horrible and that I know that I can never view life, mine or anyone else's, the same again.  I know that there are people in Uganda who are holding out hope that I will remember them and their sufferings.  And not just remember, but actively engage myself and others, in loving them the way Jesus does.

I haven't talked to anybody except the people in my house since I have returned home.  I honestly am struggling for words.  What do you say when someone says, "Tell me all about it." Or "How did you like Africa?"  I know this sounds simple and I should just answer the questions, but my experience and memories of it, are still so raw and personal and I have not quite figured out what to do with these feelings. I think that is why I am writing this.  It is easier to write it than to talk about it.  I cried all the way home from the airport and my husband was confused as to why.  I was confused too.  I guess it was because it was all so beautiful and so traumatizing at the same time.  I need your continued prayers.

Great memories:
Kibule, our driver, saying in his very limited English, "Uganda is easy."  He saiid this because the people are kind and loving for the most part.

Despite their circumstances, the Ugandan people seem to hold out Hope and look for the good and the blessings in life.

I have never known anyone as gracious and polite as the people I met.  Always saying, "Welcome back, Terra."  Even if I just walked out and right back into the gate.  Everyone would say, "Welcome back!"

They prepare meals for you and refuse to let you help with anything because you are a guest.

"Never give up" was written across the back of a vehicle i saw driving by.

*Riding as the 3rd person on a boda boda
*squatting over pit latrines everywhere I went (Even had to pay $2 to squat over one in the city.)
*dead cockroach in my bed
*accepting and eating a piece of fruit from the very dirty hand of a small child (how could I say no?)
*cooking all of our meals outside over an open fire
*having to explain over and over again why Americans are fat (they use that word as a compliment and want to know how they can be fat too)
*trying to convince my new friends that I was not a 25 year old Spanish girl (although I felt very complimented!)
*telling the story over and over again about why I have so many dogs and why I put a sweater on them if they are cold.  They laughed harder each time I tried to explain.
*explaining snow and sled riding and snow men
*Recho asking where "the place of convenience" was when I was asking where the bathroom was
*a Ugandan man wearing a Cowgirl Up thirst

What I learned about myself:
*that when I am weak, He is strong
*i am to be a light in the darkness, and what that really looks like
*i have a larger capacity to love and be loved than I knew before
*i am braver than I thought I was

This is the information for ECM:
Every Child Ministries
PO Box 810
Hebron, IN 46341

Www.ecmafrica.org
219-996-4201

As I mentioned earlier, I will be working to raise money. I will be selling beads made by the children so that I can send the money back to their projects.  Recho and I are working together to create a safe place for the at risk Karimojong girls to stay and sleep at night.  They have to come off of the streets. They are being beaten and exploited in unimaginable ways.  This is going to take the help of others to raise enough money to help protect them but they are among Uganda's most vulnerable and that is why I have decided to focus on them. If you would like to help me in any way possible, please contact me:

sunbuggymoon@yahoo.com.        

You can also call me if you have my phone number; I am not going to post it online.  Or for those of you I see on a daily basis, just ask me how you can help.

Thank you for taking this journey with me.  Your prayers gave me strength when otherwise I would have fallen apart.

I love you all!!!!!!!!!!
Terra

"I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will guide you with My eyes."  Psalm 32:8